Saturday, September 06, 2003

a box of paradox

To:  Tina
Fr:  Cyndi
>Subject:  Re:  Friday
>Date:  Sat, 6 Sep 2003 21:30:04 –0700

You are wonderful, you are precious, you are go’geous, you are loved. You are nothing and you are everything, crap and priceless treasure worth dying and living for all in one beautiful paradox! A box of paradox are we all!

reason and rhyme
motion and time
lemon and lime
nickel and dime

water and dam
lion and lamb
thicket and ram
the Great I Am

searching, reaching, diving, drowning
still inside, the head is crowning
moving downward, inside out
this pain is hell I whispershout

i dont know how to live this way
i want to die--now--every day
i smack my head remembering
that death alone supplies the sting
that deals the blow to life's confusion
doubt and sin and blind delusion

Lord, please drown me now in Grace
deliver me and take my place
fill my lungs with Gospel air
and show me now that YOU can bear
my death and life in lovely order
a citizen on Heaven's border

help me catch the little foxes
of trickery and paradoxes
of lies i make myself believe
of smoke and mirrors that deceive

i thank You, Lord, for this arena
where You strike keys and love my tina
who grabs my hand and steals my heart
whose kids say sh** and hell and fart
who seeks Your heart with such abandon
without concern for what she'll land in
kiss her, hug her, stroke her hair
deliver from the dragon's lair
whisper sweetness in her ear
Grace and more Grace let her hear
disappear the sores and boils
slather her with Abba's oils

searching, reaching, diving, drowning
we live the hope of bridal crowning
on and up, His resonance
this is Life, His very Presence

That’s all there is right now. Hope, anguish, grace, sprinklings of sweetness, untangling from barbed wire of our own and others’ stringing, but barbed wire grace for barbed wire tangles. He is enough. May you be in the place of you&Him. Pray for me as I pray for you. Grace be yours in ridiculous abundance right now.

xo, ~c.