Fear or Yield

"Look at us. We're so afraid of each other."

Those were the words of my friend last night. She's renewing her wedding vows next Tuesday, and only being allotted 50 guests, they whittled the list down, inviting only the people with which they both had comfortable relationships. But yesterday after looking out across the seating area, envisioning the guests, she could not imagine looking out during this most momentous occasion and not seeing every one of the faces of the girlfriends who had come to know, love, and experience her. Not all the Ya-Yas were invited. In fact, only two.

She called me for input on an email she had composed to explain why only two were invited, and then go on to make an invitation to one and all. Had I heard from the ones who hadn't been invited? Were they offended? Was she just projecting? Would there be further offense when they read that it was adults only? And how would the hostess feel about their going well beyond 50...?

Disturbing to me was the fact that despite the closeness the seven Ya-Yas once shared, here we were five years later asking the same questions we asked in high school--Did I hurt her feelings? Do I apologize for doing something I felt was right at the time? Will we ever be close again?

We are still so afraid of each other. Deep down, we all bear the fear of rejection. We enjoyed a camaraderie and closeness envied by all the other women in our lives. And yet, when it comes right down to it, we never really developed an intimacy much different than that of other groups. How very sad...

Believers, of all people, have an opportunity the world does not to share an intimacy not of this world. In Christ, we are not free to sin, but free to not sin. How vitally life-changing it would be for us and for those in our everyday lives if we lived like we believed this! In recognizing our own poverty, we are free to embrace the deficiency in others, thereby entering into the companionship of beggars.

Offense is only one of the tools the enemy uses as a multi-pronged knife to slash God's lambs. But when we allow the blade to stay in, permit it even deeper entry, it becomes our choice to hold the dagger's handle, twist it, and when time comes for dislodging, if gangrene hasn't already set in, the disemboweling leaves us chewed up, torn apart, poisoned, disfigured, and wretched.

I speak to me firstmost in this: Children of the Living God, is the life of the Son of God in you getting the chance to manifest His holy innocence, simplicity, and oneness with the Father? If you do not desire that, then pray for the desire. When was the last time you wanted to give up something you had a "right" to? We have enough to defend against in this world. Let us look to how we can be comfort, compassion, and life to one another since we have at our disposal all the power that raised Christ from the dead.

Bend the neck. Bow the knee. Lift your hands. Asking is a rule of the Kingdom. Servanthood is our exclusive privilege as Christians. Jesus is at the ready for you with the basin and the towel.