My Girlfriends

I found it! I thought it was long gone in the belly of the dead computer, but I just found it! Yea! This is for all my girlfriends, past, present, and future. I toast you.

My Girlfriends

By Cyndi Mulligan ©2006

• Girlfriends laugh, even when they don’t get it because it’s simply fun just to be together.
• Girlfriends snuggle and cuddle and get great comfort from that closeness, and there’s nothing unnatural going on.
• Girlfriends listen with their whole hearts even when it’s not about their own selves.
• Girlfriends care about every little thing that’s going on in their girlfriends’ lives, and if you don’t tell them the deep stuff, they might even get their feelings hurt.
• Girlfriends love their girlfriends’ children just like their own. And they wouldn’t mind whoopin’ on ‘em a little for ya if ya don’t wanna do it your own self, but only if they really deserve it, but by the time they tell you all about it, they don’t really want you to anymore, and really, neither do you.
• Girlfriends take up an offense and stick up for one another even when it goes beyond reasonable and sane and for the gazillionth time.
• Girlfriends remember the special dates, even the bad ones, and mark them on their calendars.
• Girlfriends love looking at pictures of themselves being all together, and even if they look the best in the picture, they don’t say so.
• Girlfriends love when one of ‘em tells how wonderful they all are, and each one knows quietly deep down inside that she is the most special to that one and the real reason that just got said.
• Girlfriends love to eat together and don’t need a special occasion to do it. Even though it always tastes better when someone else fixes it, they are willing to actually make something their own selves for the sake of community. And just to have more stuff available for all the girlfriends to eat.
• Girlfriends love to soak in hot water up to their chins even after their skin gets all pruney, just cuz it’s so good to all be together.
• Girlfriends love to listen to one of ‘em read out loud to ‘em, especially if it’s a book about other girlfriends.
• Girlfriends get under one another’s skin so deep that even after carrying one of 'em for miles and miles, they'll carry her another thousand just 'cause they can't live without her.
• Girlfriends look the sweetest to one another after they’ve just told you they not only know about the sin you’ve just confessed and have been trying to hide, but that they love you and want you anyways and have all along.
• Girlfriends will go to great lengths not to hurt one another’s feelings, even when it would be more helpful to everyone if they went ahead and did.
• Girlfriends love to stay up late and talk and talk and talk before they finally pour themselves into bed. And they still look beautiful to one another when they wake up all wirey haired in the morning just cuz they love each other heartloads.
• Girlfriends love to sit and swing and hold each other’s legs and kinda rub on ‘em a little, just to be touching, especially when there aren’t any kids around and it’s a lovely, warm day. Swinging only makes it lovelier.
• Girlfriends don’t hate the husband one of ‘em has a legitimate complaint against and has just railed against for the last two hours, because they all know he is a man and as such, automatically may not do the right thing at the right time in the right attitude, and we all know that and have one of ‘em our own selves and understand the venting thing, so we save our hate for things like spiders and wrinkles and people who are downright mean.
• Girlfriends love to help one of ‘em get all dolled up for a special occasion, especially when she’s not used to getting all dolled up. We are just sure that our personal touches will ensure that she is the bell of whatever ball she will be attending and that her queenliness is evident to all just because of our assistance.
• And last, girlfriends are the most precious when they tramp through your muck with you, and you find yourself on the shore of Hope with the horizon of Joy just ahead, and you have arrived there propped up by their weary yet faithful arms, and although you are all limping some from the journey, they have loved you into your Abba’s arms, singing and dancing all the way, knowing that you will sing and dance in the end, too.

sandy time

My friend, Sandy, invited me to go to Harrington with her today to a bridal shower for the daughter of a long-time friend of hers. I was totally thrilled to be asked and couldn't wait for the almost-2 hr road trip!

Of course the time passed ridiculously quickly, and we began the journey talking about me. My longest, most involved conversations begin with talking about me and mine... I have to grab my jaw at some point and aim it toward my friend and ask, "So tell me about YOU..."

Wish I could include more pictures of Sandy connecting with old friends and community members she knew growing up, but alas, I took none. There just didn't seem to be a timely opportunity. I did bring back two small bags of exquisitely fresh lavender blossoms encased in sweet little tulle bags, but not after toting about 15 bags of the same for Sandy, along with maybe two pounds of turtle cake someone bagged up for her to take home to her little girls just 'cause. She is just that kind of person--you want to give her stuff and tell her how wonderful she is, knowing everyone thinks the same way you do.

Yeah, we talked about chemo and about her upcoming radiation, about her mastectomy and her reaction to it, about diet and eating organic and her family's adaptation to a radical dietary change and her new 'do and post-surgery drains. She is amazingly forthcoming and straightforward. She is upbeat and prayerful, focusedly worshipful and praising, humble and selfless. She is a wonderful friend and sister. Sometimes I want to poke her and ask Are you for REAL?!!!

I'm trying not to be afraid that she will be taken from us in the next few years. Taken from me. She is that rare good soul, the kind movies are made about and who are doomed from the beginning because of their goodness. Y'know, the good die young thing.

I know that there's something misaligned in my thinking, but right now, it all seems completely reasonable. There is the Them and the Me, and Sandy is most definitely a Them. In my mind, she keeps company with those great dead authors, the ones who have left behind a legacy of faith and intimate relationship that we today dream of and aspire to in our higher moments. She would gag at these thoughts of mine if she knew them, which would only further endear her to me.

I just thank You for now for the gift of her friendship, for the weight of her having wanted me along. Keep me righthererightnow. XO

Banks Lake

We went to Banks Lake for a few days and brought along a friend each for Ryan & Jylle. Apart from the mosquitoes, the snotty neighbor, the $112 ticket we got for letting the boys ride in the boat on the road back, the biblical storm, and the haze from the nearby burning town, it was great! The water was perfect, the cliffs were all heights to jump from, the friends from Seattle were fantastic company, there were showers and a volleyball court, and we all stayed safe & happy. No more to want from a vacation! We laughed so much. I love that part. I learned more about these people and even a little about myself. I'll share that sometime if it's still interesting by then.

Kev's favorite view

Kaylee & Jylle, beautiful in clay

Captains Awesome!

Sugar for the Camera

I pretty much passed out on the way home. Didn't even remember dropping off Kaylee. My hip hurts from the flat mattress, we all have hundreds of mosquito bites, I can't find the kitchen counters for the stuff we have to put away, there's sand in every container & clay in my swimsuit, we're three days behind in work that needs to be done before school starts........ and I wouldn't change a thing.