Why So Insecure?

Why are we so insecure?

I just found out that someone I've been friends with for two years spent a lot of time wondering if I liked her. It all made sense when I heard that because she's called to apologize on several occasions for comments she made to me that might have been gossip, and since gossiping is not an admirable or godly trait, she called to say she was sorry. The last time she did that she added, "... because I didn't want you to not like me." I was so taken aback by that because I knew that if I were to let go and gush about how deeply I respect and admire and enjoy her, she'd probably wave me off and walk away in unbelief.

I don't think her insecurity came from something I said or did. I think that came about on her part. But she's so cute, fit, talented, educated--she's an engineer, a substitute teacher, a home schooler, and a consistent volunteer at a soup kitchen. I always thought of her as humble, selfless, hard-working, and of such golden character. If she knew how highly I thought of her, perhaps she might have one less insecurity in her life.

Now that I think of it, I remember one author (I think it's Hannah Whitall Smith) saying that the enemy of our souls doesn't care what we occupy ourselves with as long as it's not Christ. It can be a seemingly valuable ministry, the unplanned pregnancy of a daughter, a preoccupation with personal finances, or frequent thoughts of how well or how poorly we come across to others. Makes no difference to him--it all misses the mark, and that's his joy.

John the Baptist comes to mind. He doesn't seem like someone who struggled with insecurity. In fact, he seems like one of the most settled people I've ever heard of. He dressed like a caveman, ate honey & hoppers (and yuck--I don't care HOW sweet they are), and was all for the crowds switching allegiance from him to his cousin. Look at where his focus always was. And check out what Jesus said about him (Matt. 11:11)!

I want to be completely insecure about my flesh and as equally secure about the One on whom I am totally dependent. Focus our focus, Lord.